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    <title>Gentleman&apos;s Dictionary and Usage</title>
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   <id>tag:www.twochapstalking.com,2007:/dictionary//7</id>
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    <updated>2007-03-07T17:38:21Z</updated>
    
    <generator uri="http://www.sixapart.com/movabletype/">Movable Type 3.2</generator>
 
<entry>
    <title>Cally-Forn-Ya</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.twochapstalking.com/dictionary/2004/01/callyfornya.html" />
    <link rel="service.edit" type="application/atom+xml" href="http://www.fireandknives.com/cgi-bin/mt/mt-atom.cgi/weblog/blog_id=7/entry_id=400" title="Cally-Forn-Ya" />
    <id>tag:www.twochapstalking.com,2004:/dictionary//7.400</id>
    
    <published>2004-01-12T16:59:23Z</published>
    <updated>2007-03-07T17:38:21Z</updated>
    
    <summary>Imagine the wrestler Giant Haystacks being put in charge of Disneyland and pronouncing the name of the place Duz-Ner-Lund. Money grabbing right wing fools on the West Coast of America have chosen as their leader a barely literate sexual molester...</summary>
    <author>
        <name>S</name>
        
    </author>
            <category term="C - Cabin boy to Curvaceous" />
    
    <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.twochapstalking.com/dictionary/">
        <![CDATA[<p>Imagine the wrestler Giant Haystacks being put in charge of Disneyland and pronouncing the name of the place Duz-Ner-Lund. </p>

<p>Money grabbing right wing fools on the West Coast of America have chosen as their leader a barely literate sexual molester with his 'brains' in his biceps. Similar to the Idiot-in-Chief but with muscles.</p>

<p>'I'll be back,' you managed to say.</p>

<p>Well we sincerely hope you won't.</p>]]>
        
    </content>
</entry>
<entry>
    <title>Poachers&apos; Relish</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.twochapstalking.com/dictionary/2004/01/poachers_relish.html" />
    <link rel="service.edit" type="application/atom+xml" href="http://www.fireandknives.com/cgi-bin/mt/mt-atom.cgi/weblog/blog_id=7/entry_id=399" title="Poachers' Relish" />
    <id>tag:www.twochapstalking.com,2004:/dictionary//7.399</id>
    
    <published>2004-01-12T16:58:22Z</published>
    <updated>2007-03-07T17:38:21Z</updated>
    
    <summary>A tangy relish ideal for use as a garnish on all cold roast meats, pies and sausages. Should be kept on hand in the glove box for emergency game pie consumption. http://www.fortnumandmason.com/cgi-bin/WebObjects/Fortnums.woa/wa/BFShoppingDirectAction/product?product=8473&amp;menu=Shopping_Catalog...</summary>
    <author>
        <name>S</name>
        
    </author>
            <category term="P - Pabulum to Pyx" />
    
    <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.twochapstalking.com/dictionary/">
        <![CDATA[<p>A tangy relish ideal for use as a garnish on all cold roast meats, pies and sausages. </p>

<p>Should be kept on hand in the glove box for emergency game pie consumption.</p>

<p>http://www.fortnumandmason.com/cgi-bin/WebObjects/Fortnums.woa/wa/BFShoppingDirectAction/product?product=8473&menu=Shopping_Catalog</p>]]>
        
    </content>
</entry>
<entry>
    <title>Fortnum and Mason</title>
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    <link rel="service.edit" type="application/atom+xml" href="http://www.fireandknives.com/cgi-bin/mt/mt-atom.cgi/weblog/blog_id=7/entry_id=398" title="Fortnum and Mason" />
    <id>tag:www.twochapstalking.com,2004:/dictionary//7.398</id>
    
    <published>2004-01-12T16:56:51Z</published>
    <updated>2007-03-07T17:38:21Z</updated>
    
    <summary>The queen&apos;s favourite grocer. Also provides groceries for Her Majesty. High tea at Fortnum&apos;s is an essential rite of passage. For years starving ex-pats and reluctant ŽmigrŽs have relied on Fortnum&apos;s to send life saving supplies. http://www.fortnumandmason.com...</summary>
    <author>
        <name>S</name>
        
    </author>
            <category term="F - Fabulous to Futtock" />
    
    <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.twochapstalking.com/dictionary/">
        <![CDATA[<p>The queen's favourite grocer. </p>

<p>Also provides groceries for Her Majesty. </p>

<p>High tea at Fortnum's is an essential rite of passage. </p>

<p>For years starving ex-pats and reluctant ŽmigrŽs have relied on Fortnum's to send life saving supplies.</p>

<p>http://www.fortnumandmason.com</p>]]>
        
    </content>
</entry>
<entry>
    <title>The Few</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.twochapstalking.com/dictionary/2004/01/the_few.html" />
    <link rel="service.edit" type="application/atom+xml" href="http://www.fireandknives.com/cgi-bin/mt/mt-atom.cgi/weblog/blog_id=7/entry_id=397" title="The Few" />
    <id>tag:www.twochapstalking.com,2004:/dictionary//7.397</id>
    
    <published>2004-01-12T16:55:41Z</published>
    <updated>2007-03-07T17:38:21Z</updated>
    
    <summary>August 20th 1940 House of Commons Never in the field of human conflict Has so much been owed By so many To so few. Our &apos;friends&apos; around the world, particularly in those countries that forgot to rush in at the...</summary>
    <author>
        <name>S</name>
        
    </author>
            <category term="F - Fabulous to Futtock" />
    
    <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.twochapstalking.com/dictionary/">
        <![CDATA[<p>August 20th 1940 House of Commons</p>

<p><i>Never in the field of human conflict<br />
Has so much been owed <br />
By so many<br />
To so few.</i></p>

<p>Our 'friends' around the world, particularly in those countries that forgot to rush in at the kick-off (you know who you are), would do well to remember this from time to time.</p>

<p>[Don't see: Special Relationship. Because there isn't one]</p>]]>
        
    </content>
</entry>
<entry>
    <title>Luddites</title>
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    <link rel="service.edit" type="application/atom+xml" href="http://www.fireandknives.com/cgi-bin/mt/mt-atom.cgi/weblog/blog_id=7/entry_id=396" title="Luddites" />
    <id>tag:www.twochapstalking.com,2003:/dictionary//7.396</id>
    
    <published>2003-11-11T18:31:10Z</published>
    <updated>2007-03-07T17:38:21Z</updated>
    
    <summary> A delightful trend begun by Ned Lud in Leicestershire at the beginning of the Industrial Revolution. When the introduction of a stocking frame threatened to take his job from him old Lud smashed it to bits and exhorted his...</summary>
    <author>
        <name>T</name>
        
    </author>
            <category term="L - Labour to Lycanthropy" />
    
    <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.twochapstalking.com/dictionary/">
        <![CDATA[<p> A delightful trend begun by Ned Lud in Leicestershire at the beginning of the Industrial Revolution. When the introduction of a stocking frame threatened to take his job from him old Lud smashed it to bits and exhorted his pals to do the same. </p>

<p>Luddism flourished in Blighty from 1811-16. </p>

<p>Though similar in result to certain occasions when the Chaps may have smashed machinery in their own brief working tenures this is not thought to be Luddism per se. </p>

<p>More a case of lunching rather too well.</p>]]>
        
    </content>
</entry>
<entry>
    <title>James Smith and Sons</title>
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    <link rel="service.edit" type="application/atom+xml" href="http://www.fireandknives.com/cgi-bin/mt/mt-atom.cgi/weblog/blog_id=7/entry_id=395" title="James Smith and Sons" />
    <id>tag:www.twochapstalking.com,2003:/dictionary//7.395</id>
    
    <published>2003-11-11T18:30:11Z</published>
    <updated>2007-03-07T17:38:21Z</updated>
    
    <summary>When was the last time you were offered an adjustable walking stick and encouraged to swagger up and down the length of an original Victorian shop to ascertain the correct length for your new umbrella? Founded in 1857 James Smith...</summary>
    <author>
        <name>T</name>
        
    </author>
            <category term="S - Sable to Syphillis" />
    
    <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.twochapstalking.com/dictionary/">
        <![CDATA[<p>When was the last time you were offered an adjustable walking stick and encouraged to swagger up and down the length of an original Victorian shop to ascertain the correct length for your new umbrella? Founded in 1857 James Smith and Sons on New Oxford Street in London have been keeping English men and women dry and giving them something to lean on for generations.</p>

<p>They were one of the first companies to use the Fox frame, that is the wire frame that all umbrellas use, and they offer over seventy different types of wood. All this in a shop that has remained almost unchanged for 140 years.</p>

<p>Jealous of the bamboo handle on your lady friend's Gucci bag? Get a Whangee handled city umbrella and leave her in the shade, or indeed rain. Worried about having to fend off unwanted approaches? Get a solid English Apple wood umbrella that isn't only good for beating your way through bracken. Fancy the odd tipple and don't want to carry a flask? Keep it in your cane.</p>

<p>Whatever you do don't leave home without one, as it will rain, but the sun will come out tomorrow.</p>]]>
        
    </content>
</entry>
<entry>
    <title>Evelyn Waugh&apos;s Noonday Reviver</title>
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    <link rel="service.edit" type="application/atom+xml" href="http://www.fireandknives.com/cgi-bin/mt/mt-atom.cgi/weblog/blog_id=7/entry_id=394" title="Evelyn Waugh's Noonday Reviver" />
    <id>tag:www.twochapstalking.com,2003:/dictionary//7.394</id>
    
    <published>2003-11-11T18:29:13Z</published>
    <updated>2007-03-07T17:38:21Z</updated>
    
    <summary>1 hefty shot of gin 1 (1/2 pint) bottle of Guinness Ginger Beer Kingsley Amis - &apos;Put the gin and Guinness into a pint sliver tankard and fill to the brim with ginger beer. I cannot vouch for the authenticity...</summary>
    <author>
        <name>T</name>
        
    </author>
            <category term="E - Easy to Exuberant" />
    
    <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.twochapstalking.com/dictionary/">
        <![CDATA[<p>1 hefty shot of gin<br />
1 (1/2 pint) bottle of Guinness<br />
Ginger Beer</p>

<p>Kingsley Amis - 'Put the gin and Guinness into a pint sliver tankard and fill to the brim with ginger beer. I cannot vouch for the authenticity of the attribution, which I heard in talk, but the mixture will certainly revive you, or something. I should think two doses is the limit.'</p>

<p>O to move in such exalted circles.</p>]]>
        
    </content>
</entry>
<entry>
    <title>Rem acu tetigisti</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.twochapstalking.com/dictionary/2003/11/rem_acu_tetigisti.html" />
    <link rel="service.edit" type="application/atom+xml" href="http://www.fireandknives.com/cgi-bin/mt/mt-atom.cgi/weblog/blog_id=7/entry_id=393" title="&lt;i&gt;Rem acu tetigisti&lt;/i&gt;" />
    <id>tag:www.twochapstalking.com,2003:/dictionary//7.393</id>
    
    <published>2003-11-11T12:36:31Z</published>
    <updated>2007-03-07T17:38:21Z</updated>
    
    <summary>Pronunciation: rem-&apos;Š-&quot;kŸ-&quot;te-ti-&apos;gis-tE Etymology: Latin You have touched the point with a needle : you have hit the nail on the head....</summary>
    <author>
        <name>T</name>
        
    </author>
            <category term="R - Rabelais to Ruthless" />
    
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        <![CDATA[<p>Pronunciation: rem-'Š-"kŸ-"te-ti-'gis-tE<br />
Etymology: Latin<br />
You have touched the point with a needle : you have hit the nail on the head.</p>]]>
        
    </content>
</entry>
<entry>
    <title>SH</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.twochapstalking.com/dictionary/2003/10/sh.html" />
    <link rel="service.edit" type="application/atom+xml" href="http://www.fireandknives.com/cgi-bin/mt/mt-atom.cgi/weblog/blog_id=7/entry_id=392" title="SH" />
    <id>tag:www.twochapstalking.com,2003:/dictionary//7.392</id>
    
    <published>2003-10-28T17:14:01Z</published>
    <updated>2007-03-07T17:38:21Z</updated>
    
    <summary>Soho House. A private members club famous for soggy carpets, something called the &apos;Brit Pack&apos; and freshly wiped toilet lids. Of its three locations only one is actually in Soho, but that&apos;s probably not unrelated to what precedes the frantic...</summary>
    <author>
        <name>S</name>
        
    </author>
            <category term="S - Sable to Syphillis" />
    
    <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.twochapstalking.com/dictionary/">
        <![CDATA[<p>Soho House.</p>

<p>A private members club famous for soggy carpets, something called the 'Brit Pack' and freshly wiped toilet lids. </p>

<p>Of its three locations only one is actually in Soho, but that's probably not unrelated to what precedes the frantic and frequent wiping of the toilet lids.</p>

<p>The Gentlemen have not been asked to become members though they confidently expect to be thrown out one day.</p>]]>
        
    </content>
</entry>
<entry>
    <title>Italian tanks have five gears, one forward and four reverse</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.twochapstalking.com/dictionary/2003/10/italian_tanks_have_five_gears.html" />
    <link rel="service.edit" type="application/atom+xml" href="http://www.fireandknives.com/cgi-bin/mt/mt-atom.cgi/weblog/blog_id=7/entry_id=391" title="Italian tanks have five gears, one forward and four reverse" />
    <id>tag:www.twochapstalking.com,2003:/dictionary//7.391</id>
    
    <published>2003-10-28T17:13:18Z</published>
    <updated>2007-03-07T17:38:21Z</updated>
    
    <summary>An hilarious joke. See also: Question; What&apos;s the difference between a piece of bread and Italians? Answer; You can make soldiers out of a piece of bread. (International Translation Note: &apos;Soldiers&apos; when made from bread are thin strips of buttered...</summary>
    <author>
        <name>S</name>
        
    </author>
            <category term="J - Jabot to Juvenilia" />
    
    <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.twochapstalking.com/dictionary/">
        <![CDATA[<p>An hilarious joke.</p>

<p>See also: </p>

<p>Question; What's the difference between a piece of bread and Italians?</p>

<p>Answer; You can make soldiers out of a piece of bread.</p>

<p>(International Translation Note: 'Soldiers' when made from bread are thin strips of buttered bread used for dipping into a boiled egg. Thus one's Mum would say <i>'Do you want a chucky egg and soldiers for your lunch?'</i>)</p>]]>
        
    </content>
</entry>
<entry>
    <title>Little Red Cars from Modena</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.twochapstalking.com/dictionary/2003/10/little_red_cars_from_modena.html" />
    <link rel="service.edit" type="application/atom+xml" href="http://www.fireandknives.com/cgi-bin/mt/mt-atom.cgi/weblog/blog_id=7/entry_id=390" title="Little Red Cars from Modena" />
    <id>tag:www.twochapstalking.com,2003:/dictionary//7.390</id>
    
    <published>2003-10-28T17:12:11Z</published>
    <updated>2007-03-07T17:38:21Z</updated>
    
    <summary>Apparently there is an Italian motor car company in a place called Modena that makes little red cars which go quite fast. The people who drive them often have dark hair. Some wear sunglasses when the sun isn&apos;t out. Since...</summary>
    <author>
        <name>S</name>
        
    </author>
            <category term="L - Labour to Lycanthropy" />
    
    <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.twochapstalking.com/dictionary/">
        <![CDATA[<p>Apparently there is an Italian motor car company in a place called Modena that makes little red cars which go quite fast.</p>

<p>The people who drive them often have dark hair. Some wear sunglasses when the sun isn't out.</p>

<p>Since they are not Astons, Jaguars or Lotuses we need know no more about them.</p>]]>
        
    </content>
</entry>
<entry>
    <title>Fetching Windowpane Thornproof</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.twochapstalking.com/dictionary/2003/10/fetching_windowpane_thornproof.html" />
    <link rel="service.edit" type="application/atom+xml" href="http://www.fireandknives.com/cgi-bin/mt/mt-atom.cgi/weblog/blog_id=7/entry_id=389" title="Fetching Windowpane Thornproof" />
    <id>tag:www.twochapstalking.com,2003:/dictionary//7.389</id>
    
    <published>2003-10-28T17:11:23Z</published>
    <updated>2007-03-07T17:38:21Z</updated>
    
    <summary>Galloping over fields, hedges and bracken, or indeed when desiring to appear as if one has, a chap needs to look his best. Not only that but it&apos;s never a bad thing in such circ.&apos;s to be protected from scratchy...</summary>
    <author>
        <name>S</name>
        
    </author>
            <category term="F - Fabulous to Futtock" />
    
    <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.twochapstalking.com/dictionary/">
        <![CDATA[<p>Galloping over fields, hedges and bracken, or indeed when desiring to appear as if one has, a chap needs to look his best. </p>

<p>Not only that but it's never a bad thing in such circ.'s to be protected from scratchy thorns. Or indeed ladies' nails. Hence the thornproof, where the wool used to make the jacket is of such a tight and heavy construction that the jacket could conceivably be stood in a corner unaided.</p>

<p>That it bears a windowpane check is evidence of its being intended for the countryside where the rules on colour are more relaxed.</p>

<p>And if it wasn't fetching then a chap would hardly wear it would he?</p>]]>
        
    </content>
</entry>
<entry>
    <title>OS</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.twochapstalking.com/dictionary/2003/10/os.html" />
    <link rel="service.edit" type="application/atom+xml" href="http://www.fireandknives.com/cgi-bin/mt/mt-atom.cgi/weblog/blog_id=7/entry_id=388" title="OS" />
    <id>tag:www.twochapstalking.com,2003:/dictionary//7.388</id>
    
    <published>2003-10-28T17:10:29Z</published>
    <updated>2007-03-07T17:38:21Z</updated>
    
    <summary>Ordnance Survey is the official mapping agency of Great Britain. First formed by order of George II in 1746 to help keep the rebellious Scots in order. They have been making the world&apos;s finest maps ever since. They are particularly...</summary>
    <author>
        <name>S</name>
        
    </author>
            <category term="O - Oats to Oysters" />
    
    <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.twochapstalking.com/dictionary/">
        <![CDATA[<p>Ordnance Survey is the official mapping agency of Great Britain. </p>

<p>First formed by order of George II in 1746 to help keep the rebellious Scots in order. They have been making the world's finest maps ever since. </p>

<p>They are particularly important during the various Unpleasantnesses that afflict our nation. During the Normandy landings for instance they provided around 120 million maps.</p>

<p>Not only that but they help enormously when a chap gets lost in the grounds of whatever country house he may or may not be visiting.</p>]]>
        
    </content>
</entry>
<entry>
    <title>Babbington House</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.twochapstalking.com/dictionary/2003/10/babbington_house.html" />
    <link rel="service.edit" type="application/atom+xml" href="http://www.fireandknives.com/cgi-bin/mt/mt-atom.cgi/weblog/blog_id=7/entry_id=387" title="Babbington House" />
    <id>tag:www.twochapstalking.com,2003:/dictionary//7.387</id>
    
    <published>2003-10-28T17:09:42Z</published>
    <updated>2007-03-07T17:38:21Z</updated>
    
    <summary>A glorious country house in Wiltshire now used as a private members club, sister to Soho House in London and New York. First settled in the 12th Century it enjoys rolling grounds, classic architecture, luxurious period details and cutting edge...</summary>
    <author>
        <name>S</name>
        
    </author>
            <category term="B - Babouche to Byronic" />
    
    <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.twochapstalking.com/dictionary/">
        <![CDATA[<p>A glorious country house in Wiltshire now used as a private members club, sister to Soho House in London and New York. </p>

<p>First settled in the 12th Century it enjoys rolling grounds, classic architecture, luxurious period details and cutting edge technology to ensure guests have everything they could dream of. </p>

<p>Babbington House even offers professional hairdryers in guest's rooms. </p>

<p>Oh and a shed load of gakked-up Soho dickheads. </p>

<p>But then you can't have everything can you?</p>]]>
        
    </content>
</entry>
<entry>
    <title>WMD</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.twochapstalking.com/dictionary/2003/10/wmd.html" />
    <link rel="service.edit" type="application/atom+xml" href="http://www.fireandknives.com/cgi-bin/mt/mt-atom.cgi/weblog/blog_id=7/entry_id=386" title="WMD" />
    <id>tag:www.twochapstalking.com,2003:/dictionary//7.386</id>
    
    <published>2003-10-28T17:08:51Z</published>
    <updated>2007-03-07T17:38:21Z</updated>
    
    <summary>Words of Mass Deception issued by the jackals in charge of the Land of the Misled. Slavishly adhered to by Bush&apos;s man in London and disbelieved by anyone with half a brain....</summary>
    <author>
        <name>S</name>
        
    </author>
            <category term="W - Waffle to Wykehamist" />
    
    <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.twochapstalking.com/dictionary/">
        <![CDATA[<p>Words of Mass Deception issued by the jackals in charge of the Land of the Misled. Slavishly adhered to by Bush's man in London and disbelieved by anyone with half a brain.</p>]]>
        
    </content>
</entry>

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